There really must be a change in the way a parent communicates to the child. Why I would say so? Coz its so damning to know those imprints remain on your mental screen space for a long time. Undoing those is an effort of a lifetime. There are some fears instilled in you. You are made to sleep, act in a certain way by use of fear as a tool. When you grow up fine, the fears don't just go away. They make you live your life always hoping to have a cushion bed to fall on or to avoid risks altogether.
I wondered why with every situation that did not go in my favor did I hear a faint voice asking me "now what?" .. and "what if i had". So apparently this scenario becomes so scary that everytime I do anything or face any event, I try to avoid going into now what and take solace in the fact that I will always have a 'Backup plan' .. Plan B
The focus of where do I put my emotions take us strongly onto the side of waiting for the disaster to happen and the kick of assertion with the readiness of a Plan B.. if mentally at all. The placebo effect of 'I am going to be fine because someone else has also thought this before me and I belong to the same race' is narcotic, if I am using the right word.
We seem to want to be intoxicated with fantasy. We have no capacity to be real. No judgements but after your mind has been fed with umpteen fodder for your own protection by concerned influencers, you have no ounce of energy left to fight your own battles afresh when they happen. This edginess of scare makes us develop battles where there aren't any just so we could finally unleash the preparation and effort we did to combat it all of our conscious while. Sadistic though, the winner and the loser is the same. You. While one ego part may rejoice having protected you in some way through warnings, the other one wanting to experience may be fatigued out of the battle that was not necessary in the first place.
Plan B is an effort. Its a divide and rule policy of your consciousness cause it does not have better challenges.
The challenge to know you are not a follower of any but someone who should lead all of your minds. That playing victim and being small will not fetch you your dreams. That keeping yourself in the midst of the crowd is not security.
Frankly, we don't have an option. No one asks us whether we would like to take birth now and be alive. You don't get to choose your birth date. We are given certain things. They are ours to accept and the acceptance will let you move on to bettering with what you have.
And giving yourself too many options only makes it worse.
When your mind knows there is no way out, it will let you through.